As I negotiate the murky waters of grief made even more so by the distance between me and the dearly departed I find myself searching for things to help me connect to the loss. Is there a song on the iPod that will bring the tears? A poem? A movie?
One of the most challenging things to do (at the best of times) is to stay present. I've got a couple of months of travel coming up at the beginning of June and it's incredibly tempting to future-trip my way to departing, traveling and returning back home in fantastical avoidance of the Here and Now.
"Life is a trip," is what I've been saying lately in reference to all that can happen in a day or a week. I honestly don't know how people do it, and by that I mean live, without a spiritual life. What sustains me, what keeps me going and fills me with hope and excitement and the willingness to keep moving forward is faith.
Faith in the Power that makes the grass grow, the sun shine and the wind blow. Faith in the Abiding Presence of this Power in the minutiae of our daily lives. Faith in Love, that inexplicable Energy that springs forth majestically in even the darkest of situations.
For me, this faith is not blind. It's not hoping. It's not wishing. It's practical and it takes work. It's practical because it makes me want to live fully and deeply, which is a heck of a lot better than wanting to die and I've been there done that. And it takes work because it requires prayer, meditation, demonstration and practice to bear fruit.
This blog, as I've mentioned before, is part of this faithful work. When I woke up this morning I was heavy with the burden of facing another day. Not wishing to stay in that place and being aware, at least on some level, of the incredible abundance in my life (making gratitude practically mandatory), I set about doing the things I needed to do to shift my thinking.
As I head toward completion of this post I have a lighter spirit, my energy is beginning to flow and I am feeling much more like do-ing the tasks at hand while be-ing in the present to do them.
The shift began with willingness on my part. "Despite my fear I am willing to move forward." From there I sought help from Higher Guidance. "Help me, take this day, show me. I'm small, I'm weak, I can't do it alone." Slowly but surely my energy has been restored, returning little by little as I do the next thing, take the next step, walk through the fear.
The rain falls steadily but I can see the Sun behind the clouds.
Inspiring Message of the Day: Life's a trip. An ever-unfolding adventure. When we forget this idea and it instead feels like a slog we can ask the Higher Power Back of All Things to support us and hold us up. It will carry us forward with steadfast Love.